Do you know what I hate?!

I couldn't resist blogging a mini "YKWIH?" today after numerous incidents with a very specific pedestrian pet peeve that I know many people have been the victim of. And I can bet, that some of you have even been guilty of this charge. Shame on you! (and on RARE occasions, sometimes me. But RARELY.)

So you know what I hate?? Human sidewalk barricades. And even worse, human sidewalk barricades that hold hands. (see pic above, which btw, is a REAL pic from one so called violator). This weekend must have been a national holiday for these human barricades bc I must have encountered at least 10 cases and in each I do the usual fast pacing around them and plant myself right in there eye view so they know that they are guilty of a walking violation. Or sometimes when I'm feeling ballsy, I tell them to "speed it up" or "get out of the way!" I mean, really?? Is there a need to block a whole sidewalk because you refuse to unattach yourselves from your significant other or because you are so ignorantly oblivious that there are thousands of people with a purpose walking down that same sidewalk behind you ready to pummel you and your little love fest?? And to top it off, sidewalks on busy streets like Broadway in SOHO (ahem!!!)are not runways for love display, leisurely strolls, or batting eyelashes because you WILL get runover or screamed at by a friendly New Yorker.

Next time you find the need to hold hands with your lover boy, or you want to walk at turtle pace as you answer emails on your blackberry or bbm (bc you know you aren't watching out for traffic and it's very easy to become roadkill when you are on your PDA), please pick a more obscure or residential street to moronically display your annoying habit.

Here's to you. Here's to me.

Kathy.

Delactable Trifecta.

This past weekend marked my first non official weekend back in the city. For the past couple of months, I've often been uprooted (by choice of course) because of vacation (oh what a hard life!), family obligations, work, etc and now that summer is winding down for us east coasters, that means a return to city activities and fun! So I decided to "go big and go hard" and cram into one weekend what I normally like to do when I find myself lazily enjoying the city on Saturdays and Sundays during the fall and winter. If you guessed, eating and drinking, well, then you're a smart cookie.

I wouldn't consider this blog a full fledged foodie review but still a delightful first impression to some great spots I had the pleasure of dipping into!
So let's start with my first stop- Hundred Acres. I met my two besties, Javy and Bets, for a long overdue brunch. I picked Hundred Acres for two reasons: First, this restaurant is from the same people that brought you Five Points and Cookshop, both amazing! Secondly, they have a very bold brunch menu. Not your basic omelets and french toast. All items have a unique twist to them. We started off with the warm cream biscuits, which were moist and buttery (yum) and then we split the glazed buttermilk cake doughnuts that came with a chocolate dipping sauce. Jav and Bets weren't big fans of the donuts since they were a bit greasy, but greasy is just the way I like it, so they were a hit with me! After feeling quasi stuffed with our starters, Bets and I decided to go with the frittata with summer squash, squash blossoms, green tomatoes, basil, and crescenza cheese as our main entree (I died for that cheese!see pic above). First of all, the presentation was so perfect, I didn't want to cut into it. I was a little hesitant only because I am not a fan of egg yolk (traumatized by mima. As a kid, she who would feed my cousin, Michi and I, raw egg yolk every time we visited her house) and usually request egg white only' but, this sounded too delicious to pass up! And I was right. It was beyond tasty. I had insane flavors running through my mouth and all the veggies were so fresh! Im so intrigued with the rest of the menu, that this definitely will not be my last visit to Hundred Acres!

Second stop on the food train- Doughnut Plant. En route to Brooklyn, Coco and I made a pit stop at this rave reviewed hip sweet shop. Ok, so there are two types of doughnuts: Those made from yeast and come in a variety of creme filled and jelly filled, or the cake doughnuts which are a little more doughy and moist. Some options, which btw just reading the names were making me salivate, included vanilla bean, creme brulee, tres leches, and peanut butter. I went straight for the tres leches and ran out of the door. The doughnuts are ginormous so for the unbelievable price of $2, you get a nice savory portion. When Coco and I took a bite out of that doughnut, I think I got cross eyed from shock. The good kind of course. Like that feeling you get through your body when you are SO enjoying a food high that you NEVER want it to end. That's what that tres leche did for me. And its now a day later, and I still can't stop thinking about it. There's a little voice in my head that keeps saying "I need to go back. I must go back" and sample every flavor on the menu. Its a must try on your NY travels!

And finally, we made a bar stop at the Brooklyn hot spot, Prime Meats- a hipster, meat loving joint that does not disappoint! Walking into this rather quaint, rustic farmhouse spot, you automatically assume that if the food is as meticulous and chic as the decor, then you can rest assure that the meal will be just as good. Coco and I ate at the bar where a friendly waitress/bartender, served us some delicious brunch punch made from fresh watermelon and gin. thirst quenching! And after browsing the menu for a quick minute, we both immediately blurted "lamb sandwich!"
Let me just say, that the girth of this sandwich was absolutely genial. Not fat (we know how i feel about those) and not terribly anorexic thin. This sandwich had the best curves. Two seconds later when I sunk my teeth into it, the only thing I could muster was "OMG. OMG. COCO. OMG. UN F#$% BELIEVABLE." Best sandwich EVER. The lamb was thinly sliced and tender. Bread was nicely toasted and the chili mayonnaise sauce gave it that extra pizazz so that each bite was just as flavourful as the first. I could have had 3 sandwiches all to myself. Coco agreed! Washed it down with some brunch punch, and I suddenly had a second wind. We had other plans so had to run out so all I had was a tease of the vast amazingness this place has to offer. So, I will be back. I must go back!

Here's to you. Here's to me.

Kathy.

You Know what I hate??!

Its that time again for my very favorite post (also a hit with my fans..ahem, i mean friends)- "you know what I hate?" Where I skim through my ridiculously extensive list of pet peeves, pick a good few ones, and just go off.
I hope you enjoy the following 3 I have selected for your ranting pleasure. They are very close to my heart!

Pet Peeve #35245624652-
You know what I hate???? Fat sandwiches. They annoy me. I roll my eyes at them. I mean, what's the point of making a sandwich so fat, it doesn't even fit in your mouth and you cant chew it bc its total exercise and then you get a bad case of TMJ trying to shove it in your mouth. Seriously?! Whatever happened to 2 turkey slices, 1 slice of cheese, 1 or 2 tomatoes max, and maybe, if theres space, some lettuce?? That's a good ol' American sandwich. Now all I get at the deli are these roided up sandwiches that instead give me anxiety rather than hunger fulfillment. And then when I tell Coco that "I hate fat sandwiches. I don't like anything fat", I set myself up for some really inappropriate joke on his end, that he loves to repeat each time I make that statement.
Note to sandwiches: Skinny is much more attractive. I vote for skinnywiches. I'm officially banning the fatwich. The next time a deli guy gives me a fat sandwich, I'm going to get my diva on and throw that sandwich in his face. Or better yet, jam it in his mouth. Oh wait. Cant. Bc it wont fit!!!

Pet Peeve #4563456354-
You know what I hate? Toothpicks. OMG do I hate toothpicks. I especially hate when guys keep them in their mouth and they are dangling with no purpose. First of all, its totally trashy. You shouldn't be cleaning your teeth with a toothpick in public to begin with. That's like, Etiquette 101. Secondly, its not a prop. Nor is it an accessory so please take it out of your mouth if you are talking to someone, hanging out with friends, driving your suped up Mitsubishi Eclipse, or trying to be all "gangsta". Note: It looks stupid on "gangstas" too. (see any picture of P. Diddy). And lastly and most importantly, its completely unattractive and not cool and you look like a total COMEMIERDA.

Pet Peeve #3563536-
And last but not least, you know what I hate? When couples say "We're pregnant!". No, "we" are not pregnant, the woman is pregnant. Thanks dad for being so elated you feel like your belly will also become the size of a hot air balloon, and your vagina will stretch out like a super sized rubber band when that baby makes its way out of its little dorm in your wife's (keyword being wife) body. Not the case, and I'm not taking away from the joy of childbirth from any parent-to-be because its a miraculous thing and I myself will one day be there, but lets be real. Theres only one person that's going to carry that baby and their body is going to morph into all sorts of weird- basketball face, swollen feet, pregnancy acne, an additional 50 pounds of excess weight, bad sleeping patterns, and maternity jeans. So forgive me for throwing up in my mouth and rolling my eyes at this sort of exclamation. And note to Coco, please don't ever say that the day that we are blessed with the most beautiful baby in the world. Because I will punch you in the face. (That goes for all my peeps out there too.)

Here's to you. Here's to me.

Kathy.

Batter Up!

My first attempt at adding a link! (I'm a bit blog handicapped so please bear with me).

Anywho, I came upon this article on Jezebel.com (see below) and I thought it was absolutely genius. Um, why hasn't anyone in the great US of A thought of this?? And the best part, no men allowed. Only ladies allowed to vent freely and destructively here.

Do you not know the amount of followers a store like this would have? Forget Barneys Warehouse sale or a 50 percent off Jimmy Choo sale, the Chinese got it right! Yo go Asians! I mean, what woman doesn't love bashing and breaking things to let off a little steam?! I do! I do! (you out there, don't get all superior on me saying "oh, not me." because you know you dream about tearing up your kitchen when that husband, boyfriend, or child of yours can clean up after themselves and you are at a breaking point. And since you aren't going to beat the bejesus out of them, might as well do the next best thing!)

Personally, I prefer a pile of cheap dishes and maybe a bat and a TV. I'm just sayin'.

Here's to you. Here's to me.

http://jezebel.com/5581748/pissed-take-it-to-chinas-frustration+venting-store%22%3E

BALLS!!!!

When a blog is simply titled "BALLS!", you know you are in store for something good.

I never knew there was such a huge meatball cult following until I moved to NYC and married an Italian. It was around this same time I learned that Ragu canned tomato sauce on any pasta is basically considered a deadly sin--FOGEDDABOUDIT! ( as you can imagine, I sinned A LOT since a can of Ragu is a staple in many Cuban homes like mine).

So through Coco and the vast Italian culture of NY Italians, I was introduced to fresh sauces, spices, and equally fresh meatballs made from ground beef, pork, veal--a combination of two of these, or even three. Goodbye microwavable balls! I was hooked. So imagine my delight when I read about a new restaurant in the Lower East Side of Manhattan aptly named "The Meatball Shop". But, seems like TMS and I had a serendipitous introduction back in May when I was invited to the launch party for the Cooking Channel and they had a station featuring their famous balls on a bowl of polenta. Two balls later and I was salivating. Um, can I shove 100 of these balls in my mouth because they are ridiculously delicious, mouth watering, and fresh!! Liked they picked the ingredients right from a floating garden and put them on my plate. Great first impression.

A couple of weeks later, I convinced Coco and our bff Bets, to trek downtown and feast on some balls so they could make their own assessments. The shop is owned by two childhood friends, Daniel Holzman and Michael Chernow, with a passion for meatballs. Michael's wife, even contributes her culinary skillz to the homemade ice cream sandwiches. And believe me when I say, its sweet tooth heaven.

Back to the balls. Ordering is easy and fun with a sort of built-it-yourself menu and the main ingredient on the menu is, you guessed it, meatballs! If you fancy something simple, you can go with the 4 meatball selection (you can choose classic meatball, spicy pork, chicken, veggie, or a weekly special) in whichever sauce (classic tomato, spicy meat sauce, Parmesan cream, or mushroom gravy) your starving heart desires. And the best part about these balls is that they are not over soaked in sauce so no real chance of agita as the Italians say. If you want something a little more adventurous hit up the sliders ( a personal fave!), or the heroes. Or if you want to go all the way, then sample the Meatball Smash complete with healthy salad. You're not done. Don't even think about asking for the check without enjoying one of TMS's yummy ice cream sandwiches. The chocolate cookie with caramel ice cream is plainly put, orgasmic!

It's my fourth time hitting up this hip rustic country kitchen and I'm already planning a fifth visit in the near future. While some may have an issue with the limited options in terms of dishes, I disagree. Give me a meatball 10 different ways and I call that genius. The late hours, people watching (opened til 4am) and cheap prices don't hurt either! As my friend Betsy says, "It's AmazingBALLS!".

Here's to you. Here's to me.

Kathy

Heaven on Earth.

There are certain things that people can't live without.

For me, that's champagne, jasmine green tea, Forever 21, bistec empanizado con papitas fritas, and my closest family and friends. DUH. But there's one more thing that's an uber necessity to my continuous inner happiness. It feeds the recessionista in me. Can you guess the 6 letter word that literally gives me stomach flutters and makes my palms sweaty every time I'm at close proximity to the shopping MECCA?!!
If you guessed, TARGET, not only must you be super pretty and smart, but clearly you are a fashion forward and budget friendly human being deserving of your blessed life.

TARGET has arrived in Manhattan!!!! Yes, the red bulls eye is shining over the East River signaling and calling all smart shoppers (including me). I'm one of the many in this island that has been counting down to opening day and watching as that structure has slowly been resurrected along the FDR Drive. As my bff, Javy, says "Its the Dadeland Center of Manhattan." (for my non Miami followers, Dadeland Center is a shopping pavillion in Miami that also holds a Target, Best Buy, Michael's, and some other retailers).

Another reason why I NEVER want to leave this island (next, I'm working on getting a Forever 21 store at the corner of 79th and 2nd). Not sure if its the fact that I can buy toilet paper, towels, an Isabel Toledo bathing suit, and a digital camera under one roof, but theres a feeling of determination as I push my shopping cart in the store, and then a feeling of accomplishment when I walk out with my shiny red and white plastic bags. Ive conquered the world. Or actually, Target has successfully conquered my bank account. I think I speak on behalf of every Target lover when I say, you walk into the store with 3 things on your list, no more than $30 lets say, but you've managed to spend $300. Yep. Welcome to my life. I literally lose my brain in those aisles.

On a quick serious note, this Target opening is a great thing for Manhattan. Not because of the convenience of being in the city, but this store has created over 500 jobs and it is expected to generate millions of dollars and be one of the most popular stores in the country. I'm sure it will also be just as crowded, but, if you arrive 15 minutes before opening and happen to be one of the first consumers there, you will definitely beat the crowds and get your hand on those designer collections that fly off the rack (and in my case, get my hands on a size small before all the fat girls who think they are a S but are really an XXL, hijack them from me).

Next time you find yourself low on tooth paste or box of wine, make an event out of it and head to Target in Harlem. I'm sure you'll walk out with a new bedroom set and possibly some patio furniture bc it is that amazing!!!!

Here's to you. Here's to me.

Kathy.

You Know what I hate??!

So you are going to be reading A LOT of these "you know what I hate?" blog posts. or for those that know me very well, my 100,000 pet peeves. Maybe its my low threshold for tolerance,or that fact that I'm easily annoyed and have very little patience, but i have a LOOOOOOOOOONG list of pet peeves that seems to be getting bigger and bigger the older I get...

So lets start with 2 things I REALLY hate...

1) whistling. I HATE when people whistle. Its Ear Abuse, quite frankly. What's the point? That's why songs have words. So that you can sing them. No need to whistle or hum. Humming is whistling nasty, "que tu pintas aqui" cousin. Whistling is neither chipper nor soothing to you or those around you (emphasis on "those around you".) Its very bothersome and most people do not have whistling rhythm. Also, please don't try to whistle Beethoven's symphony. You are not a walking orchestra. Or also, Jamie Foxx's Gold digger. It sounds SO much better when the original artists do them.
And while we are on the topic of music, there's no need to sing out loud. That's why God and the good people at Apple, invented ipods with headphones. I don't want to hear you sing and I certainly do not need to hear you a) sing over your ipod or b) hear your music through your headphones. Really?! Are you deaf?? or just cheap because you cant buy good headphones. I do not want to be on a morning commute listening to Lil Wayne on the way to work. Not really my morning jam. And coming from uptown, I definitely do not want to hear any form of reggaeton blasting from your headphones to my sensitive ear. Its criminal. Indecent Music overload should be fined!

2) I know several people, and by close I mean family members, that insist on collecting key chains. Not one or 2, but like 13 of them. And they only hold one key. Really??! Is this because you are an avid key chain collector?? or because you need to find your keys in your Guess bag??? It's plain stupid. No one needs more than one key chain. Do you really need Betty Boop key chains, flip flop key chains, furry ty babies key chain to hold your one house key??? Next time I see this chotchky violation, I will personally peg you with all your tacky key chains.

Thanks for letting me blow off steam. I could scratch those two pet peeves off my list. Only 234,446,678 left on the list!

Here's to you. Here's to me.