Calabaza, Calabaza! - Baby Buccio Update- Week 38.

Hot off the press!

13 days to go until Maya makes her royal visit! And by the signs of these very frequent Braxton Hicks contractions I'm currently having, I hope it means she will be an early bird. This past week was the first week I felt ready to have this kid! I sat across Coco and said to him "babe, I'm done!". Even though I'm feeling good overall, I'm pretty much done feeling like I have an exaggerated beer belly. I am currently at 142lbs (seeing 142 on the scale was sort of like seeing a mystical creature like a unicorn or a my little pony. Weird) I have gained 31lbs. I'm uncomfortable, my cankles are ginormous (see pic above!), tired and IMPATIENT. Patience has never been my strongest virtue. I want to get started on taking care of this baby! lol. I got my game face on! I've been nesting- cleaning closets and drawers, throwing stuff away, and vacuuming. A lot. I have even upped my walking since I've been told it can bring on labor! This past Friday, I walked 30 blocks! Well, waddled. But let's be real. We just really want to meet this mini-me we made! So many scenarios are playing out in my head- seeing her for the first time, holding her, kissing her, touching her, taking pictures of her for future Facebook loser lonelies, stalking her like a psycho-loving mom, staring at her because she is so amazing, obsessing over her, and dressing her like my personal runway model. Duh. It feels so exhilarating to picture all these mental slide shows and I can only imagine that when it does happen, it will be 1000 times to infinity and beyond better!

When I went to the doctor last week, I was 1 centimeter dilated and 30% effaced ( which means the lining of the cervix wall is thinning out in preparation for labor). Now this bit of news doesn't mean the baby is coming out now. I wish it did because I'm ready to roll! She said it could be this week, or 1 week or my actual due date. It's up to Maya at this point. But it does mean that it is very unlikely she will come after the 26th. So fingers crossed she comes soon!!! Her heartbeat was strong and the Wu says she's about 6-6.5lbs and 20 inches long. She's the size of a pumpkin! (calabaza in spanish) And my belly has dropped a bit (when your belly drops, it allows you to breathe a lot easier because it means the baby has lowered itself into the pelvic area in preparation for birth) and baby's head is snug inside my pelvic bone. When she checked me, she felt the tip of the baby's head which was SO cool! At least it was to me! Tomorrow I have another doctor's appointment for another check up to see how much more I've dilated and effaced.

This past weekend we (and I mean Coco) set up the Angel Care monitor, we attached the porta crib firmly to the bed, continued with our stroller for dogs and dummy practice runs, and we have tried and failed to get the dogs to sleep on the floor. Go figure. But in all honesty, it's not like we've been forceful about it. And Coco insists he needs Lola in his arms in order to sleep. (Marriage Ref, where are you?!) In the next couple of days we are going to sterilize the baby bottles so we can start filling them with champagne, I mean, milk! And today we finally got Maya's beautiful bedding in the mail and we are washing it tonight (at least Coco is, reluctantly) and dressing the crib. With that said, the room will be 100% dunzo!

With just weeks until the BIG day, I'm feeling a little like the Jersey Shore, doing my own GTL. Only mine is more BMP- blowout, mani and pedi! Always camera-ready because pregnancy is never an excuse to let yourself go! (unless I'm under house arrest and then anything goes!).

Today I'm wrapping up my weekly update with a little twist. And it's dedicated to the special men in your lives! Some of you on this email are either having babies, have babies, trying to have babies, one day will have babies (or not) and this is a great "heads up" to pass along to your other half, if you haven't already. As you go through your pregnancy, you will get countless advice from friends, doctors, strangers, and books. People can't help it but some it will actually be helpful. And dads too will get their own manual when it comes to co-existing with a preggo wife. Guys, the rules change and most of them aren't in your favor (unless you rather be right and miserable) in the way you like them to be, BUT if you follow those rules carefully, you will be a far more sane and happy man! Case in point, my personal favorite of advice given to dads and dads-to-be, Do not argue with a pregnant woman. Make it your mantra. You will not win. You are going up against a godly figure who is in physical discomfort, tired, and did I mention the obscene amounts of estrogen that have taken over her body?! All arguments and reason go out the window, as I have explained to Coco plenty of times but he sometimes forgets.

Such was the case yesterday when he comically thought he was going to prove me wrong (he automatically failed). To remind him of such expected disappointment when these situations arise, I sent him this fellow dad's article below as a soft reminder. So I am going to share it with you ladies so you can save it for a rainy day. Just in case. YOU'RE WELCOME!

For the record because I'm a big fan of recognition and giving credit, Coco has been superb throughout this experience, which I'm sure if you asked him, he's probably wanted to kill me a couple of times or ten because even I know I'm a moody bitch, have a PHD in naganomics, and I'm VERY anal. But he loves me for these same special qualities. I wish for everyone to have a supportive and involved partner like him by their side when they're ready to have a baby! He's an angel and I'm truly blessed.

Hope you enjoyed this week's play by play! Bases are loaded and we are in the final home stretch! I'm going to miss sharing these updates with my fellow guys and dolls but I promise you, it won't be the last of them!

MILF in training,

Kathy

Don't Argue With Your Pregnant Wife

By Stephen Covington

So, early last week, my wife was dropping some hints that she was ticked at me for either something I had done, or something I was supposed to have done, but didn't. Just to set the record straight, my wife is the greatest woman in the world, and fortunately our arguments are few and far between. And I'll give her credit that usually when she gets mad there's at least a half way good reason. Having said that, my experience is that pregnant women in general are more apt to get ticked at the smaller things, than those that are eating for one, so to speak.

So anyways, she's upset about something. How did I know? Besides the looks and body language, I always know something's up when I hear an abundance of the words "fine", "ok", and "nothing". And the context doesn't really matter. "How's your mom doing?" "Fine." "How are you feeling today?" "Ok". "What's wrong?" "Nothing." Uh oh! "Is it ok if I play basketball tonight?" "Nothing would be finer." When those words start flying, I know I'm in for a "talk" sometime soon. And I love talking to my wife, but I am a man, and so this type of "talk" doesn't rate as my top 10 things to do.

Moving on to the point of all this. I had an idea as to why she was upset, and after three days of fines, oks, and nothings, I knew the "talk" was coming soon. (As a side note, things are always better after the "talks", but again, I'm a guy.) Before I leave for work she says, "I think we need to talk when you get home." Thanks honey. Now I have all day to think about it. So what do I do? I start to plan my defense. On this one I know I'm right. I've got argument A, B, and C. I've even got exhibits and even a little DNA evidence. There's no way she's going to win. As I get home from work I'm going through my opening statement one last time.

After we get the baby down to bed, it's time to battle it out. I've got my note cards out, and I'm ready to take her down. Then something happens as she begins to let me know why she's upset. I still know I'm "right", but I start to think about the consequences of my being right. What will I get out of it? Will I win the argument? Maybe. Will my wife get more upset? Probably. Can anything positive come out of me convincing my bride why she is wrong and I am right? I couldn't think of even one thing. So what did I do?

I sat there and listened. (Again, I'm a man, so actually listening instead of just pretending to listen is a step ahead in itself.) I still felt the urge to at least bring out exhibit B because it really was good, but I didn't. I told her I understood why what she was talking about had made her upset, that I was sorry for making her feel that way, and promised to try to do better to keep it from happening in the future. We hugged, kissed, and everything was good. And it was over in less than 10 minutes. And I meant every word I said to her.

A couple last thoughts. I still believe I was 100% "right" as far as the argument went. The things she said I had and hadn't done weren't completely true. But that doesn't matter. Perception is reality, and how she was feeling was true for her. To try to convince her otherwise would have been useless. And, the last time I'll say it, I'm a man, and I'm sure I probably did do something to tick her off. The pregnancy aside, you have to look at the outcome you want in deciding how to handle a fight with your spouse. There are times to battle, but when it comes to the feelings of your baby's mother, sometimes it's best not to be "right".

Don’t pick fights with her. She will be moody, sensitive, and possibly whiny. Try not to upset her even more. If she tries to pick a fight with you, just consider the source. Her hormones are all out of whack while she is pregnant, so cut her some slack. Remember that your relationship is extremely important. Stay away from arguments, no matter how tempting it might be to fight back.